tony robbins talks about the 6 human needs

  1. certainty
  2. uncertainty/variety
  3. significance
  4. love/connection
  5. growth
  6. contribution

the first 4 can yield happiness but fulfillment can only be achieved with the inclusion of the last 2. i haven’t interfaced w/ this material in a really long time but it’s coming up now.  how are these needs being met ? are the decisions/vehicles/methods i’m using to meet these needs healthy or unhealthy? which needs am i prioritizing at the moment?

reflect and soak this in nai.

hi after effects

i missed u.
i don’t visit nearly often enough.

today ends w/ u giving me the swerve on the motion tracking i wanted. tbh the motion tracking is fine.  but whenever i duplicate files they call point to the same parent source, so if i personalize one call out title they all change! all attempted workarounds have failed. the answer is somewhere out there doe.

i’m a crazy man.

it’s just like EVERYONE around me saidjust start. you’ll get into flow AND love it. you love doing this KIND OF WORK.

holy fuck.

goddarnshit so much fun!!!!

it’s fucking crazyballs that i was soooooooooooooooooo avoidant. jeezuz fuck. once i just focused on EDITING. it. was. straight. glory. i mean ZERO pain. not to mention it was only a 3.5hr edit–i mean i have been exposed to the footie for a bit now but i really haven’t been thinking about it. shit. perhaps my subconscious has? or was i just hype to edit again? whatever the case i’m DONE with my initial rough cut.  kyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa❤❤❤❤😂. it was so nice poking and plucking at numerous ways to tell the story. nudging the universe before me. it was DA BEST. hah.
oh man.
😁✌🏾i’m dead.

okay and now it’s 0518.. deets tom. or some other time. for now. victory 🙌🏾 i wish i was involved since the beginning on this project.  hm…. well maybe not. i just wish the footage was just coded better. like for real.

i will admit this: i REALLY HATE unorganized or disorganized footage.

a systematic setup means an easy workflow. and that means i can focus on the edit and just the edit. and man does that feel good. i will most definitely study/read up on classic editing styles and adopt all the industry-standard principles at once 😈😁❤💋🐱‍🐉💖


love you world.
bye now..

count it

i’ve never considered the amount of blogs chase or i have published thus far.
i think i’m at 98 posts, which is kinda cray. i say this to say this, i’m ALWAYS looking, judging, and evaluating my work but if i step back and look at the work i’m NOT eyeing–i’m proud.


the things i eye the most grow the slowest. this ethos is also embedded in gary vee’s document over create.

build. go brick by brick. stop looking all the time.

love you universe


why do i only feel motivation to adhere to them 5 seconds after the buzzer goes off?

do things really have to go bad before i change my ways?

is it a hard-headed rock bottom issue? maybe i really don’t comprehend the value…

perhaps my life luck has ossified this  bad habit.

guilt and shame are good motivators—why isn’t delivering on time?  those with anxiety or an obsessive work ethic are blessed in this regard. pops always said, “those who don’t listen feel”—i’m on that path. reputation is everything and i keep toying with mine..

freelance is damn near impossible without a healthy rep.   not to mention as technology democratizes the film world, creative aptitude and reputation will be the only shiney differentiators.

will u survive nai nai?

things are in flow. and this time, for once, i’m not just referring to work, freekance, efficiency, romance, or life luck in general. i mean internally. mentally. i guess they have been for awhile. admist the constant future talk and life mapping i’ve been able to maintain an appreciation of and connection to mindfulness.

i don’t  always journal or blog. i don’t always jog or get seven hours of sleep. i don’t always reach out to all my love ones or check my finances—all things that are important to me. but i DO meditate for at least 10 mins a day. and even on the rare occasion when i “miss a day” the benefits of daily practice continue to bleed into waking life, nourshing my mind.  every so often, every few hours, i lift my head from the constant rage of internal dialogue and simply observe.

i must admit meditation isn’t new to me at all. i’ve had long runs prior but this era is different. the guided meditation with sam harris has pointed my focus in specific directions, nudged me toward the mirror and asked me to “look for my head”—where does the seat of consciousness rest? i’m much more sensitive to the clouds of sensory data that bubble to the surface, unsolicited they roll into view. i’m more comfortable on the tiny raft of consciousness that floats atop the entire universe. thank you for that gift sam.

love u universe


my amazing 15-minute call.

today deaf&mumbles lover-n-manager called from work and unveiled something wonderful. a plan. also i don’t think this was an authorized break…

anywhoo amidst the pool of overwhelm and despair she found me in emerged a plan. today’s task was super fun task– get acquainted with swan’s ronin-s.  love affair begun.

oh, and here’s our plan of attack. more to come once swan loads in her data:

JC Bumper

  • Friday, March 22⋅13:30 – 17:30 Edit & Send Final Draft
  • Sunday, March 24⋅21:00 – 22:00 Edit any feedback



  • Friday, March 22⋅11:00 – 11:30 Invoice: Draft & Send
  • Monday, March 25⋅20:00 – 21:00 Send shot list  



  • Saturday, March 23⋅10:00 – 16:30 Event Shoot
  • Saturday, April 6⋅12:00 – 14:00 Shoot origin story/location scout



  • Thursday, March 21⋅22:00 – 23:00 Practice: Ronin Pt I
  • Friday, March 22⋅18:00 – 19:00 Practice: Ronin Pt II
  • Saturday, March 23⋅17:00 – 18:00 Practice: Ronin Pt III
  • Saturday, March 23⋅22:45 – 23:45 Pack for Liya
  • Saturday, March 23⋅23:00 – 23:30 Reformat Cards
  • Sunday, March 24⋅13:30 – 19:00 Shoot: Lookbook
  • Sunday, March 31⋅12:00 – 17:30 Begin rough cut



  • Friday, March 22⋅19:30 – 21:30 Sync all sound
  • March 25, 2019, 21:00 – March 26, 2019, 00:00 Build sequence
  • March 29, 2019, 22:00 – March 30, 2019, 00:00 Edit footie
  • March 30, 2019, 11:00 – March 31, 2019, 00:00 Edit Footie
  • Sunday, March 31⋅10:00 – 11:00 Send Rough Cut I


Deaf&Mumbles (general)

  • Friday, March 22⋅13:00 – 13:30 Igor: Call about potential vid


damn a plan feels good. now i can just focus on execution. no thinking. just doing. and remember the nai, the key to wading thru all blah is action. also remember chase’s words…this is what i wanted. relish in the opportunity to honor this path. HAVE FUN.

love you universe

hiring a manager and joining a team

i have two great weaknesses: planning and avoiding responsibility. i tend to (at least in this state anyway) function off the false/limiting belief that FREE time means unassigned time.  when in fact whenever i have calendar obligations that’s precisely because i’m ON COURSE to accomplish something i really cared about–HENCE PLANNING.

this week i’ve made two major investments. chase and i will finally solidify ourselves as accountability partners. i need that. and he’s very familiar with my various hang-ups, as he’s traversed or is mucking through the very same mire now.

i also need a manager.  someone who handles the organizational details.  i avoid plotting things on my calendar LIKE THE PLAGUE. planning requires popping up to take a global view, dropping back to the daily, all WHILE prioritizing ship time, blah, blah, blah–i’m dead. then there’s also the fact that i’m pretty bad (like most humans) at estimating completion times. what parts of the filmmaking process do i enjoy? shooting. meeting people. designing concepts. everything else around it, all the producer-like elements, are tough as hell for me.

and that’s not an excuse to sanction NEVER reaching proficiency in these areas but i have to be real– it’s stopping me now.

so i’m enlisting swancakes as my manager!  this is what she does!!  i’m watching her slay at keeping dawat (her short film) on task everyday. not to mention she was the primary creative mind behind the concept as well–shoutout dual wielding.  that said, as we build deaf&mumbles leveraging one another’s talents will be in our code anywhoo!  ideally this will go like the chase photo day w/ ebony: i’ll slowly live through the benefits while observing how it’s done. over time i’ll learn but in the meantime, i STAY working.

let’s see how this plan goes.   ultimately no one can DO THE WORK FOR ME…i will have to face all these demons on the plane of life at some point but in the meantime, i must play to my strengths. okay.

mouth vomit of all the things on my plate atm:

Ad-lib (Nicky’s project)

  • invoice – make sure to mention half now, half later pay wise
  • shot list – include roles for each subject and invite them to add more ideas


  • event photography w/ chase this saturday
  • promo video of her talking about her origin story while canvassing a potential event site

Liya’s project

  • shoot lookbook this sunday
  • edit lookbook
  • train w/ ronin (today, tomorrow, and saturday)

Heartbeat (Toya’s project)

  • rebuild project
  • sync sound
  • new edit
  • ship rough cut to toya by march 31st


  • send her final edit of Liya’s project in order to secure october’s wedding client


  • bumper for youtube – less than 1.5 mins due sunday
  • mini shorts for insta


  • create reel for new clients


  • review our talk
  • sketch plan
  • schedule mtg – inperson or skype

holy nuggets batman. so much to-do. and i’m sure i’m forgetting something….
love you universe


schedulding needed

i haven’t taken a swing at any of my projects. i’m living day to day again. i wake up, respond to things that come up, do some social activity, go to sleep.


where is the work? i don’t look at my weekly/monthly goals. it’s not on calendar and not on my mind.

get on it nai nai. don’t squander more time.


chase and i will be voltroning soon.  this blog is a product of that but we need a tighter glue. certain silos of our life need to be boarded up and secured. this is another opportunity to grow.


it’ll have podcast’ie feels. it’ll be honest. it will be motived by love. for our families. for our craft. for the business. and for the artist in one another we’ve been attempting to foster and grow.

love u universe. thanks for the blessing. -sHdaHero