it’s wierd. the balance between social life, the 9-5, family, hobbies vs my creative pursuits. i know one informs the other. i know there is no truly separating the two. and there seems to be this happy medium, this zone where shit works out. single or in relationship, a point where i’m not too focused on dating or my partner but i’m also not completely starved intimacy-wise.
there seems to be some sweet spot between drinking with the fellas every now and again and full on rage fests at the expense of creative reps.
there seems to me that there exists some happy medium where hanging with the famo or friends is both refreshing and rejuvenating as an experience opposed to other moments, where it feels like obligation and fear overrode a creative rep or two that should have taken priority.
my dilemma is not THAT these pulls in opposite directions exist but HOW they should be approached. do i begin malnourished and slowly add back or go all in and slowly peel away at the layers. the former seems like the obvious choice but even so reveals to me a different issue entirely. how do i know when i’ve struck balance? is the absence of creative angst? (if such a thing is even possible…) is it in healthy feedback from other parties?
hm. perhaps it’s a combination of journaling & meditation. i don’t have a rubric but i can check in and ask myself something simple: how do i feel about the choices i’ve been making.
love you universe.